Founder’s Journey

The decision to live childfree can be a significant life turning point, and it’s also a commitment that shapes the foundation of romantic relationships. As the founder of this platform, my journey has taught me that living childfree requires mutual understanding, respect, and alignment between partners.

The Journey of Partnership

My personal experience taught me that true partnership means finding someone whose life goals genuinely align with yours. Being intersex and unable to have biological children naturally shaped my perspective early on, making the childfree path a natural fit for my life plans.

What I learned through past relationships – particularly a marriage that ultimately didn’t survive – was that childfree living cannot be a compromise. When one partner is unsure or hopes the other will “come around” to the idea of wanting children, the relationship is built on shifting sand. My ex-wife and I learned this lesson the hard way, as our differing visions about parenthood created insurmountable tension despite expensive IVF attempts and my efforts to reconsider my stance.

The Professional Impact

At the time, my work investigating child abuse cases for law enforcement was psychologically demanding, and knowing I wouldn’t have children of my own made this challenging work more manageable. However, when my relationship dynamics shifted toward parenthood, the psychological toll of my profession became overwhelming, eventually leading to PTSD.

Upon reflection, this experience showed me how deeply intertwined our childfree decisions are with our careers, mental health, and ability to support each other through life’s challenges.

Finding True Alignment

Today, I’m fortunate to have found a partner who shares my childfree vision without reservation. Our relationship thrives on mutual respect and open communication. We’ve built a strong foundation because neither of us is waiting for the other to change. Together, we’re creating a life filled with experiences and opportunities that align with our shared values. The concept of childfree.life has been inspired as a result and exists because people who have chosen not to have kids, no matter the reason, should feel free to have a voice in celebrating their lifestyle.